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“A Nightmare on Elm Street”
a review by Darby O’Gill

Okay, let me take a deep breath before we go down this road. Oh yeah, it’s that bad. Here we go; another classic remake that doesn’t work. The only person that’s going to be happy with the new A Nightmare on Elm Street movie, is Robert Englund, because it’s finally going to prove just how important he is to the role of Freddy Krueger. That’s not saying that Jackie Earle Haley did a bad job with the role, he just unfortunately was in a crappy movie with bad cat-man make-up. Also on a side note, I think Christian Bale should have trademarked his gruff-raspy Batman voice, because if he had he’d be rolling in the dough by now. Seriously, does every bad-ass character in a movie these days need a Ricola?

In the new A Nightmare on Elm Street, teenagers start dying in their sleep, and they slowly start to realize the same man is appearing in all their dreams, and is trying to kill them one by one. Now, I don’t want to spoil the movie for you, but I will be talking about a few of the plot points in the next few sentences, so you’ve been warned. *SPOILERS START* Let’s start with Freddy’s back story. He’s no longer a child killer, but rather a possibly unjustly accused pedophile. Sadly this is mostly true, but thanks to some last minute re-shoots, Krueger is now guilty of being a pedophile. Doesn’t that make you feel better? He’s guilty! Hooray! He touched their naughty bits, but never killed anyone. That’s right, Freddy Krueger never killed a kid until he started killing teenagers in their sleep. Really!? If he never killed any kids, then why would he want to start killing them now? Wouldn’t he be trying to have sex with them in their dreams instead? Do I really have to point this shit out? *SPOILER END* This movie really does suck! There are some nice moments, but they are few and far between. The writing is absolutely horrible. It’s full of I say this and you say that dialogue. And at no point do they even try to do anything interesting with the storyline. I think the filmmakers were trying to kill the audience, because I almost fell asleep two times while watching the movie, and I thought the whole idea was to stay awake. Although, death would have at least put an end to Michael Bay’s molestation of my childhood once again. First Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, and now A Nightmare on Elm Street. Look, the reason the Friday the 13th and the Halloween movies work when they’re remade, is because the movies’ main characters are big masked killers that don’t talk, where as Freddy Krueger is a personality, and you can’t just replace that. Bottom line, skip this movie! Figured I’d just spell it out for you. Do yourself a favor and rent the originals. The later ones might be a little cheesy, but that’s also half the fun. There’s nothing fun about this new version, it’s just quiet simply a nightmare.

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“Wesley Willis’s Joy Rides”
a review by Darby O’Gill

Many of you probably have never heard of Wesley Willis, but I do know there are a healthy handful of you out there that do. For those who don’t, Wesley Willis was an artist, a poet, and even a rock star. You could even say he could really whip a horse’s ass. At first glance Wesley may have seemed like nothing more then a homeless chronic schizophrenic, but for those of us who took a moment to take a look closer, we got to see an amazing human being that never let his lot in life get in the way of his dreams. Wesley Willis’s Joy Rides is a documentary, I’m sorry “It’s a Rock You Mentary,” about the life and times of the Fabian Road Warrior himself. The really nice thing about this film is that they don’t just focus on his music and the cult following that followed, but they also spent a great deal of time showcasing his artwork, which is quite outstanding. My only problem with this film is that it seemed to lack a solid structure. We just seem to hang out with Wesley, which is cool, but I would have just liked a little bit more of a narrative on his life. The documentary does have moments like this, but I think a little more insight would have brought this film to the next level.
I’ve been a fan of Wesley’s since college, and I even got to see him perform at a small venue in Columbus, Ohio. To this day, I’m so glad I didn’t let that opportunity pass me by. In the last eight years here in Los Angeles, I’ve been able to see a lot of amazing performances, by some of the biggest names in music, in a room of maybe ten people, and to this day seeing Wesley still tops a lot of those moments. I’m proud to say I was head bunted by Wesley Willis one night at Bernie’s in Columbus. This documentary may not mean that much to you if you’re new to the world of Wesley Willis, but for those of us that do remember him, this movie is a must see. Say Rah… Say Raow… And, you just made Wesley very happy wherever he might be right now. The world is a better place having had you in it big guy.

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DVD Special Features:

  • Photo Album
  • Art Gallery
  • Deleted Scenes
  • “The Dead and the Dying” Short Film featuring Wesley Willis
  • Audio Conversation Clip

Not a ton of special features, but what it does have is pretty good. The art gallery is fantastic! It’s really great to be able to freeze the images on your television screen to see all the amazing details in his drawings. There’s a healthy helping of deleted scenes, and a really bad short film called “The Dead and the Dying,” featuring Wesley for all of a minute; but it’s a nice thing it have. I’m not really sure of the reason for including the eight minute audio conversation clip, but it’s there if you want to listen to it.

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